Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Sleep Deprivation Happens

"Keeping your regular sleep pattern while raising a Baby" is not a realistic title for a blog post.

"Tricks any Dad can use to convince his wife he's fast asleep when the baby starts crying" or, "10 easy ways to induce just enough Momma-guilt so that you can stay right where you are" might be best sellers if enough Dads were honest enough to submit their stories.

However, we will have to settle for something a little easier:

What is the dumbest thing you have done when in a state of zombie-quality sleep deprivation?
I have:

  • rocked an empty baby capsule for 30 minutes, including for 10 mins after I was informed it was unoccupied 
  • replaced a fluorescent desk lamp bulb with a UV lamp and worked under it for 20 mins before correctly processing the thought that it wasn't "just warming up". But my hands got a nice tan
  • mistaken the smell of chloroform and ethanol for a week (anyone who has been in a lab can tell you that's just not possible)

  • I've also been deliberately late for work so that I could watch my sons favorite cartoon with him. But that doesn't count as dumb because it was a strategy.
Unfortunately, sleep deprivation accumulates like debt. And it's the kind of debt with serious consequences. Think Three Mile Island, Exxon Valdez and Space Shuttle Challenger quality consequences. Sometimes all you can do is hang in there, do your best to avoid driving into trees, and take any nap on offer (or even if its not on offer). You also need to attempt to pay off some of the principal instead of just staying ahead of the interest. The good news is that you seem to be able catch up once your youngest hits around two. Yeah, it can be a long haul.
Dad U

So, what did you do?

From #DadsTalking:

@adam_thedad it's a tossup, falling down the stairs (baby in hand) w/ both boys, & drinking 2 monsters, 2 cups of coffee, & 2 sodas

@gopopgoblog Yawned & rubbed my eye after handling a jalapeno


  1. Haha! Love the one about rocking an empty capsule. I do lots of dumb things all the time - sleep deprivation only compounds my clumsiness.

  2. Sometime middle of the night. Removed sleeper, removed stinky diaper, wiped stinky bum, replaced sleeper, handed to mommy for mommy milk, back to sleep before head hit the pillow.

    What did I miss? How much trouble was I in in the morning? Apparently I got yelled at the time as well but just rolled over and went back to sleep. I have no recollection of any of the events just the retelling by my wife.

  3. How about falling asleep while driving... I've done that and luckily I am still alive. woke up to a passenger hitting me in the back of the head

  4. Well with my first, I've ...

    1) Heard baby cry, got up off couch, turned TV off, went and got milk out of fridge. Wife woke up in morning and asked why the TV remote was in the fridge?

    2) Had lots of head bobbing throughout the day.

  5. I've fallen asleep at the wheel a lot. The worst was when my eyes shut for a micro-second as I was approaching a traffic light. LUCKILY it was green for me and no one was turning.
    When I don't get enough sleep, I start to have deja vu states where I can't remember what I just did - I burned my baby's mouth that way once.